On this, Eliot Spizer’s last day in office, I find myself thinking not so much of the fate of our great state — we’re screwed, get over it — as about the joy that is yearly pop-culture memes. One of the delights of the beginning of every year is the fact that we simply do not, cannot, know what phrases, images, etc. will be newly iconic in a year’s time.

At the start of 2007, who among us could have imagined that the phrase “wide stance” would take on such delightful connotations? Or that “Don’t Taze Me, Bro!” would not only be mixed, but re-mixed?

And so, I asked myself at the beginning of 2008: What’s next? As always, I was surprised.

“Client-9″

So simple. So elegant.

And yet, I can’t help feel it’s a bit of a disappointment. While it’s fun to bat around (”You may know me as Client-9,” “David Paterson, aka, Client-10″), it’s not quite as malleable as “wide stance” or “don’t taze me.” It just doesn’t seem like it can be applied to as many situations, or mutated in as many ways.

I guess the cat’s out of the bag now, but I’d like to see more use made of: “I must now dedicate some time to regain the trust of my family.”

Such as:

• After a disagreeable meal: “I must now dedicate some time to regain the trust of my stomach.”
• When drowsy: “I must now dedicate some time to regain the trust of my pillow.”
• Pulled over for speeding: “I must now dedicate some time to regain the trust of my speedometer.”
• When hurling a schoolyard insult: “I must now dedicate some time to regain the trust of yo mama.”
• Caught cheating on your prostitute: “I must now dedicate some time to regain the trust of my other prostitute.”

It’s a little harder to remember, so it’s probably doomed. But I thought I’d throw it out there.
You can also try, as I have repeatedly now, telling your spouse upon his or her arrival home: “Today, I want to briefly address a private matter.” Somehow, it makes the follow up “I forgot to pick up the dry cleaning” go down a lot smoother.

What other memes await us in 2008? I can’t wait ’till the future gets here.